1. We sort of stole our title from Vulture, but all this lame C-list casting news had us thinking the exact same thing. 2. Yeah, we don’t really care about these movies, but 2.1. it’s fun to make these graphics. 2.2. It’s like shooting fish in a barrel.
Ok, so there it is. “X-Men Origins: Wolverine” has been fully (mostly?) cast and sure most of you (including us) are scratching your heads asking who these characters are, but more importantly asking who in the hell these acting cast-off, Dlisters are.
Apparently the studio’s trying to nickel and dime on the casting (maybe you’ll see it in the effects?). Sure, actors alwaysaren’t cheap, but hiring Will. I. Am? Have you ever seen this guy’s videos let alone heard his godawful music??
So who are these characters outside of Wolverine and Sabretooth? (If you were born in the ’70s like us). Most of them come from the Team X era, that pre-dates Wolvie’s involvement in the X-Men and was based around a lot of scientific experiments on mutants (or something like that).
The new editions to the cast are the hobbit Dominic Monaghan who will play Barnell (aka Beak aka Blackwing depending on how much of a nerd you are), “a mysterious character from Wolverine’s past who has the ability to manipulate energy and electricity,” according to Variety (never heard of him). Nobody Daniel Henney has been cast as Agent Zero, apparently a good tracker [ed. most half-assed post ever?]
The rest of the cast: Ryan Reynolds as the villian Deadpool, “Friday Night Lights” cast-member Taylor Kitsch will play the card-throwing Cajun hero Gambit and rounding out the cast is Liev Schreiber (Victor Creed/Sabretooth), Danny Huston (Col. William Stryker) and Lynn Collins (Kayla Silver Fox). No clue who this girl is, but she’s super cute.
Continuity nerds will moan and complain that Sabretooth was already featured in the original “X-Men” as played by professional wrestler Tyler Mane, but obviously has been recast by a greater actor in Liev Schreiber. And while, we do take issue with replacing actors in any film, Mane had nothing to do in the original film aside from grunt and smash shit. We’re assuming Schreiber has been cast so he can chew some scenery. Or something. See you in 2009 (but we’re sure we’ll wait for DVD unless someone floats us an early screening.
Jackman is reportedly signed on for 3 of these things. Best of luck. There’s also talk about some fat guy being cast as the villan the Blob. We’re sure someone else will report it first [ed. you’ve really outdone yourself here].