While watching Martin Scorsese’s “Shine A Light” documentary/glorified live concert we realized the entire problem with the Boomer generation is one of viable sexuality. The thing that makes the Rolling Stones still touring so much more abhorrent than, say, The Who or Paul McCartney, is that a large portion of their greatest hits are about fucking.
Most of us have no desire to hear “Let’s Spend the Night Together” from a shirtless 65 year old man, even if he is in amazing shape. It’s gross. This entire film is a documentary of old geezers sexing it up with hipster haircuts while some guest musicians are trotted in to make them seem relevant and Scorsese aims the camera at himself to make him seem relevant.
Marty attempts to wink at the audience by inserting Stones interview footage from the 60s, 70s and 80s where the old men are repeatedly asked things like, “how long do you think the Rolling Stones will be together and why doesn’t Charlie Watts ever talk?” It’s supposed to serve as a humorous foil to the close ups of their withered visages and show the viewer how their personalities haven’t changed much in the past 40 years. What it actually does it remind you how great everyone looked in ’65 – hell even in ’85 – and how saggy and old they are now.
At various points they trot out Jack White, whose extremely pale skin and dark hair combo actually make Keith look healthy; Christina Aguilera, who can’t stop herself from attempting to both out-sing and out-sex Jagger; and Buddy Guy, who makes it painfully obvious that the Stones actually suck at interpreting the blues. Perhaps the greatest part of the movie is at the encore when Jack White, despite his best attempts not to, ends up standing next to Christina Aguilera for the bow, touches her for the minimal amount of time necessary and then literally runs away from her into the warm embrace of Keith Richards (or anyone who’ll talk to him).
Other than the irritation of Martin Scorsese inserting himself into the beginning and end of the movie as a character – no we don’t need to hear a list of your favorite Stones songs kthxbai (
(“ok, thanks bye,” in cell text/Internet speak for you old people) – and Bill Clinton showing up to introduce his mom and solidify the viable sexuality theory, we guess the movie was OK for an overly long live concert documentary with lots of close ups of old people.
(“ok, thanks bye,” in cell text/Internet speak for you old people) – and Bill Clinton showing up to introduce his mom and solidify the viable sexuality theory, we guess the movie was OK for an overly long live concert documentary with lots of close ups of old people.
[B-] or [U for Unnecessary]
Watch: “Some Girls” from “Shine A Light”
