20 Great Actors & The Roles They Probably Just Did For The Money - Page 4 of 4

transformers-frances-mcdormandVarious – “Transformers” Franchise
One day, we suspect that the Screen Actors Guild will give some kind of special award to the “Transformers” franchise, so frequently has Michael Bay’s action franchise aided some of the best character actors alive to go off and do theater for a while rather than go and do a TV series or something. Bay, for all his flaws, has usually had a sure eye for casting and a love for undersung character actors (stretching back to people like John Spencer, David Morse, John C. McGinley and Bokeem Woodbine in “The Rock”), and started the “Transformers” series as he meant to go on, with John Turturro providing some human interest as a CIA agent. Since then, every one of the films has included some great actor to lend some degree of credibility to the green-screen shouting and metal-shredding: John Benjamin Hickey in the second film, John Malkovich, Frances McDormand (!!!) and Alan Tudyk in the third, Stanley Tucci and Kelsey Grammer in the third (Anthony Hopkins has drawn that particular card in the new movie). The results are variable (Tucci, ever the pro, seems to be having fun, McDormand not so much, though she once said in an interview that this is the only time she’s ever received her going quote for a movie, a sad state of affairs given her enormous talent), but at least it gives those of us who can’t tell the bloody robots apart something to keep us engaged.

jon-voightJon Voight – “Bratz: The Movie”/The “Baby Geniuses” Franchise
Notably absent from the list of “Transformers” sellouts above is Jon Voight, who plays the Secretary Of Defense in the first movie. We left him off because Voight has done so much absolute shit in recent years that he deserves an entry all his own. Throughout the 1990s, Voight remained a respected star, still making the occasional dodgy movie (“Anaconda” springs to mind), but also doing some great ones like “Heat” and “Mission: Impossible.” But early in the 21st century (coinciding somewhat with his shift into batshit right-wing talking head-dom), Voight appeared to become unable to turn down roles, with 2004 bringing both the TV movie “Karate Dog” and the role of a villain in “Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2.” Three years later, the same year as he made “Transformers,” Voight did another toy pic, playing the high school principal in “Bratz: The Movie.” Since then, he’s gone on to make no fewer than three further “Baby Geniuses” direct-to-video movies — 2013’s “Baby Geniuses And The Mystery Of The Crown Jewels,” 2014’s “Baby Geniuses And The Treasures Of Egypt,” and 2015’s “Baby Geniuses And The Space Baby.” At that point, maybe it stops becoming about the money and is more about Voight really being tickled by the idea of a baby that’s also a genius?

rush-hour-3-max-von-sydowMax Von Sydow – “Rush Hour 3”
A couple of years ago, one of our fellow movie websites referred to Max Von Sydow, the legendary star of, among many, many others, “The Seventh Seal” and “The Exorcist,” with the headline “‘Star Wars: The Force Awakens’ Actor To Play ‘Game Of Thrones’ Three-Eyed Raven.” But it could have been worse: a few years earlier, and that headline might have made a reference to “Rush Hour 3.” The Swedish actor has a decades-long career of greatness with only a relatively few eyebrow-raisers along the way (“Judge Dredd,” for instance), but the one that really fails to provide any explanation for his presence beyond dollar bills is his appearance in Brett Ratner’s threequel in the action-comedy franchise. The film sees Chris Tucker and Jackie Chan’s cops head to Paris in search of Chan’s Japanese adopted brother (Hiroyuki Sanada), and nearly a decade from the original, feels creaky and dated even by the low standards the previous films set. Von Sydow plays the villain (once he’s revealed, obviously, in the third act), and the whole thing is so staggeringly beneath him that his presence comes close to being the most disappointing thing in the whole movie — or would, if not for a scene where Roman Polanski cavity-searches the two heroes.

fred-claus-rachel-weiszRachel Weisz – “Fred Claus”
So long as you make a halfway decent Christmas movie, you’re more or less ensured holiday-time repeats on TV until the end of time. So it’s striking that “Fred Claus” has never taken on that sort of status — even programmers desperate for something with tinsel and reindeer are ashamed to be associated with the film. David Dobkin’s uneven, woefully tone-deaf “comedy” focuses on the angry older brother (Vince Vaughn) of Santa Claus, and the film includes a number of surprisingly established names who had enough cash dumped on their lawn to take the job: Paul Giamatti, Miranda Richardson, Kathy Bates, Kevin Spacey, Elizabeth Banks. At least their roles mostly have something to them, though, whereas Rachel Weisz’s turn as Fred’s girlfriend Wanda would be confusing even if it wasn’t one of the first jobs the actress took after winning an Oscar for “The Constant Gardener.” A Chicago parking enforcement officer (!) with a British accent that isn’t even Weisz’s natural one, the role is savagely underwritten to an almost offensive degree, something that might have been redeemed if she shared any chemistry with Vaughn. It’s a part that only makes you go “what are you doing here?” when you watch it.

Allegiant Naomi WattsKate Winslet, Naomi Watts, Octavia Spencer & Janet McTeer – “The Divergent Series”
Like the Huntsman franchise, abortive YA series “Divergent” bafflingly managed to attract some of our finest actresses to it, at least until the third film flopped and everyone involved decided they couldn’t be bothered to carry on. Presumably in part influenced by the success that people like Elizabeth Banks had with “The Hunger Games,” and with the presence of rising star Shailene Woodley in the lead role, the first “Divergent” pic (a sort of drab dystopia world where society is divided into different personality types) landed Kate Winslet as the principal villain, Jeanine Matthews (yes, Jeanine Matthews sounds like someone who works in accounts). The first sequel, “The Divergent Series: Insurgent,” meanwhile, introduced the similarly acclaimed Naomi Watts and Octavia Spencer as resistance leaders (and in Watts’ case, the mother of Theo James’ love interest character, Four), and two-time Oscar nominee Janet McTeer in a brief cameo. All four acquit themselves perfectly well, but it’s also clear from deep in their eyes that they’re hardly having the most rewarding acting experiences of their lives.

Of course, every actor does this sort of thing at some point, and so this list could have gone on much longer. Among the favorites that nearly made the cut is Imelda Staunton doing DTV Steven Seagal movie “Shadow Man” soon after “Vera Drake,” Joan Allen in “Death Race,” Laura Linney in “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out Of The Shadows,” Sally Hawkins in “Godzilla,” Halle Berry and the “Swordfish”/“Gothika”/“Catwoman” triple-threat she took after her Oscar, and Christoph Waltz in “The Three Musketeers” and “Horrible Bosses 2” (though in fairness, he was always a bit of a cartoon anyway). The first draft of this piece also had Edward Norton in “The Italian Job,” but given he was contractually forced to do that, it seemed unfair (he has no such excuse for “Collateral Beauty,” though).

There’s also Frances McDormand and Sophie Okonedo in “Aeon Flux,” Keira Knightley in “Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit,” Amy Adams in “Night At The Museum: Battle Of The Smithsonian” and “Man Of Steel,” Amy Ryan in “Escape Plan,” Cate Blanchett in “Robin Hood,” Mark Ruffalo in “Now You See Me” and its sequel, Christian Bale in “Terminator Salvation,” Alan Arkin in “The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause,” Philip Seymour Hoffman in “Mission: Impossible 3” (though that at least turned out well), Clive Owen in “King Arthur,Michael Fassbender in “Jonah Hex” (in fact, basically everyone in “Jonah Hex”), Willem Dafoe in “Speed 2: Cruise Control,” Ian McKellen in “The Shadow,Michael Caine in “The Swarm” and “Jaws: The Revenge,” John Malkovich about eight different times, Angelina Jolie in “Tomb Raider,” Bryan Cranston in “Total Recall, Jeff Bridges in “Seventh Son” and “RIPD,” and Ryan Gosling in “Fracture.” Any others you’d mention? Let us know in the comments.