Keep it simple, stupid. That seems to be the ethos guiding the rudder of “Game of Thrones” Season 6, Episode 8, “No One,” directed by Mark Mylod, and written by showrunners David Benioff and D.B. Weiss. It’s been a season of unexplainable things: resurrections, magical transformations, time travel. Though there’s nothing that Throners love more than a good heavy-duty theorizing sesh, Benioff and Weiss seem to be resisting those fan theories in “No One.” Spend hours analyzing a shadow in the “next time on” preview? Doesn’t pay off. Assume there might be a Clegane showdown? Swept away by teen puppet king Tommen.
The just-the-facts approach this episode takes is underlined by the return of the best kind of straight talk from The Hound and Bronn, who say what they mean and mean what they say, unlike say, The High Sparrow, who speaks so often in anecdotal or religious metaphor.
Braavos
One crazily speculated upon event has been Arya’s (Maisie Williams) meeting with the business end of the Waif’s (Faye Marsay) dagger. It’s due to our love for the character that fans immediately started thinking of ways that Arya wouldn’t die from the most lethal cut in this show (the belly stab is never good), but also that we straight up just won’t stand for losing any more Starks. Nope, not having it.
She seeks shelter with the ONE person she knows in Braavos, Lady Crane (Essie Davis), whom she was tasked to kill just a few days ago. The actress takes her in, and bandages her wounds — how great was it that she copped to stabbing her ex-boyfriends during fights? — but she’s not safe for long. Waif finds her, kills Lady C, and then pursues Arya through the streets and farmers markets of Braavos with the rigid intensity of some kind of Teen-1000.
Arya leads her back to the little room where she cowered with Needle, and as Teen-1000 enters, Arya chops the candle — it’s time to do this Daredevil style. She earns herself a “well-played” nod from Jaqen (Tom Wlaschiha) as she leaves Teen-1000’s bloody visage in the Hall of Faces and reclaims her name. “A girl is Arya Stark of Winterfell, and I’m going home.” F. and. Yes.
Riverlands (?)
Arya’s old pal, The Hound (Rory McCann), has taken up axe-murdering for a hobby, stalking the woods and chopping every random dude in sight, looking for his ginger nemesis from the Bros Without Banners who killed Ian McShane. He ends up finding him with a noose around his neck courtesy of Beric Dondarrion (Richard Dormer) and Thoros of Myr (Paul Kaye). So many more faves are back!
If you need a quick refresher: Thoros is a priest of the Lord of Light (with a sweet, sweet man bun), and he keeps reviving fighter Dondarrion with LoL magic. Arya and Hot Pie and Gendry were hanging out with these dudes and their crew the Bros Without Banners back in Season 3. Last we saw, The Hound killed Dondarrion, as he helpfully reminds him, “killed you once before, Dondarrion, happy to do it again.” He also has a funnily wry line as they quibble over who gets to kill the infidels. “They all bloody die,” he says, “‘cept this one here,” he gestures to Dondarrion. Just like everyone else in the show, including yourself Mr. Hound.
After a satisfying hanging, meal and a whizz in the lake (we see more of Mr. Clegane’s anatomy than ever expected), Thoros and Dondarrion try to the recruit the axe man to their cause. Though he flirted with religion, The Hound is back on the nihilist berserker murder tip. Even if he doesn’t believe in higher power or larger reasons, he seems open to the companionship at least? Or the opportunity to wreck shit in the North.