Platinum Dunes Will Attempt To Reboot The ‘Friday The 13th’ Horror Series For A Second Time

Friday The 13th

If at first you don’t succeed…

There have been twelve films in the “Friday The 13th” franchise thus far. You know what Michael Bay’s Platinum Dunes horror shingle did in 2009? They acquired rights to the series (like they have with horror franchises “The Texas Chainsaw Massacre,” “A Nightmare On Elm Street,” “The Hitcher”) and basically hit reset, rebooting the series with “Friday The 13th” directed by Bay-reboot favorite Marcus Nispel (who helmed the “Conan the Barbarian” reboot for Millennium).

What are they doing in 2014? A rebooting “Friday The 13th” yet again because their first attempt only grossed $65 million domestically with a worldwide gross of $91 million. Apparently that figure off a $19 million budget was just not enough profit. And so David Bruckner, who wrote and directed the “Amateur Night” segment of “V/H/S,” is in negotiations to direct, according to The Wrap. And it’s already dated for Friday, March 13, 2015.

Evidently Nispel’s version didn’t merit a sequel, so they’re starting over. What does that mean? Nothing. Cute and annoying teenagers will be killed all over again in various gruesome ways at Camp Crystal. It’s possible Bruckner, who previously co-wrote and co-directed the 2007 horror film “The Signal,” may go found-footage, which is always a convenient way to make an even cheaper horror movie that connects with audiences these days, but geez, $19 million for a Jason Voorhees movie wasn’t cheap enough?

Apparently not. Found-footage budgets are in the $1-2 million range these days, maybe $3 million, cause who needs good lighting or production values to watch a guy in hockey mask chop up insufferable millennials? I’d ask who exactly this tired film is for, but there will always be teenagers out there looking for a fright. Best of luck. See you again for the 2018 reboot.