Report: Despite Salacious Sex & Lesbian Scenes, Woody Allen's Barcelona A 'Bust'

Everyone is in Cannes and we’re stuck here. :

Jeffrey Wells has already written his review of Woody Allen’s “Vicky Cristina Barcelona” and he’s calling it a “bust.” (it’s supposed to come out late August via the Weinstein company).

Not necessarily a shocker. “Match Point” was fantastic, but at this point, looking more like a one-off fluke than a general return to form.

The only parts of Woody Allen’s ‘Vicky Cristina Barcelona’ that feel truly alive and crackling are the Spanish-language scenes between Javier Bardem and Penelope Cruz. These two, portraying a pair of identically tempestuous, self-obsessed painters whose marriage has fallen apart due to an overload of heat and impulse and Spanish vinegar, are dynamite together. They create spark showers when they rage and taunt and rekindle their mutual hunger and disharmony. Cruz, especially, is electricity itself. When she loses her temper, it’s sheer bliss.

Boos and jeers hit once the credits rolled and Wells, who once asked director “3:10 to Yuma” director James Mangold for allegedly circulating nude shots of his actress Vinessa Shaw, didn’t even mention the allegedly tantalizing sex scenes. This does not bode well. Then again, maybe Woody was telling the truth.

Sort of fair and balanced Update: “[Woody] “Allen has created one of his best works in years, a film that is funny, philosophical, and imaginatively explorative of the meaning of love and desire.” – says Cinematical, but to be honest, we don’t really trust these guys as far as we can throw them.